Baby needs a new pair of shoes

First, they put little flashing LEDs into kids' sneakers.

Then, they installed working roller skates. (The first time I glimpsed a kid using them, I thought I was hallucinating.)

So it was only a matter of time...

http://cgi.ebay.com/Pony-Mens-Theremin-Sneakers-Size-US-12_W0QQitemZ230182759026QQihZ013QQcategory
Z63850QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

DEFINITELY not my size.

Hmm. They don't seem to have any theremins in them.








Or ponies.






PS You [i]were[/i] hallucinating. There's no such thing as Heelys.

Right: I can't for the life of me guess [i]why[/i] anyone would call them "Theremin" sneakers (beyond the obvious motivation that nothing on the planet is more mad illin' than a theremin, so naturally merchants will try to horn in on its cachet to sell, well, anything).

Still, one wonders: If you [i]were[/i] to install theremins in sneakers, how best to implement them? Left-foot volume control, right-foot pitch? Or one theremin in each shoe, with pitch control in the toe, and volume in the heel?

Or combine the concept with Heelys--the rate at which the wheel turns controls pitch and volume. So the sound varies as one goes from left turn to right turn to straight, or skates on one foot only (probably rather tricky with Heelys, but there is skill involved in learning every intrument).

I thought of relating pitch to distance between the shoes, so that doing the splits causes a high pitched squeal, and relating volume to height of the shoes above ground level.

And to top it off, MIDI taps on the bottom...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FSFb0HtdMsg